Life at a Funeral Home – NO we are not always open
Pretty sure people, some people, think the funeral home is always open. We arent! We are not sitting around in our suits 24/7 waiting for someone to show up at the door or waiting for the phone to ring! YES it is true…I am sorry to break the news! We have hours of business. We are actually real live humans who eat, sleep, have families and actually do things outside of the funeral home! We also have days off and take vacations! So…when the answering service calls us on lets just say a Tuesday night at 11:30pm and says there is a caller on the line who wants to speak to the funeral home and it is not a new (death) call. Well we do find it a bit irritating to find out that the caller only wanted to ask if, they could bring in food, if we have pucture boards for them to use, directions to the funeral home or what time they should arrive for family hour (when they already know their fam hour is at noon, but for some reason they think that they should come a half hour or hour before fam hour, which makes no sense whatsoever). But you get my point…these questions can wait until morning! Also if i lock the door and turn off thd lights and move the open sign to CLOSED then that means WE ARE CLOSED! so…why is it that people will still come to the door and ring ths bell? Not just once. Not twice. But continue to push the button then walk to a window and peer in? It is obvious after the first time you rang the bell and no one answered that we are closed! ..i can overlook the first time you ring the bell because maybe you just walked up and the first thing a person would do is automatically ring bell. Just because a car or two is in lot does not mean someone is there and so what if we are there…we are closed! Call the phone and talk to ans service if its that damn important!!! And by important i mean if someone has passed! Not because you want to only get pricing. Or to even pre arrange…ever hear of a telephone? Lots of people have them! They are used to call people!! Most of us who want to do something that requires us to go to a place of business will use our phone to call for their hours or make appointments! Most of us have cell phones, which nowadays has internet that you can use to look up a business and get their hours and phone number!!! I would suggest getting one of these neat little things called a phone!! To be honest, the more you ring the bell or start pounding on the door, the less inclined i am to find the kindness in my heart to go see what the hell you want!
A word on clothing. You must bring us clothes for your loved one and bring them asap! We tell you that! There is no way we can wait until you drag your ass in for visitation. It takes time! Please bring them asap! Dont bring them and change your mind either! If we ask for a photo so we can style grandmas hair…bring one! Because when you come in for visitation and are not happy with her hair…well thats your fault!
Whem you are going to bury someone in a cemetery that is quite a distance from the funeral home or chirch chances of having a procession is slom. We arent making things difficult for you we are making things safe for you and your family and friends!! Ehen we say we will meet at cemetery it means we will meet you at cemeteru!! Not tell family and friends they can follow us to cemetery and to be at fineral home in the morning. If someone wants to follow the hearse thats fine but we arent waiting for you or watching that you are keeping up! Also PLEASE check with the director before just telling people that! Our hearse is going to leave when we are ready to and know how much time we have to get to cemetery so if people start showing up, it holds us up! EVERYTHING with a funeral is on a schedule. The clergy is told what time he/she is yo be at funeral home to say prayers. The church is given a time of when to expect us (they may have another funeral after you or before or have other functions) the cemetery is on a schedule, they have funerals in and out all day so when we schedule a time we have to be there to acvomodate for other funerals coming in after! Our hearse driver is given a time of when to arrive to funeral home. Other emploees who may be needed. Then if your family has booked a place for a luncheon are expecting you! So the smallest things that may seem unimportant to you ARE important! Yiu wouldnt like it if another funeral was holding up yours so give some respect!!
For those of you who may be interested in purchasing a pendant that you put a little bit of cremated remains in…when you look at the cost of these items just so you know the funeral home most likely only orders them from another company and is probably not making much if any money from them. We ONLY order them for you. So when you decide to start bitching to me about how much we charge and i tell you WE DONT charge it is what the company sells it for, do not sit there and either look at me like im tryin to screw you over or ask me for a discount! Especially dont ask me for a discount if when you made the arrangements you claimed to not have any money and had to apply for state aide. Because im not gonna either way! If you cant afford something…then dont buy it!
Now i know i have bitched alot about walk ins…i freaking hate walkins!! But if you are gonna walkin anyway despite my efforts to inform all people not too do everyone a favor and dont be a complete dikhead!! Nine outta ten times the people who walk in are assholes. Sorry, its true…not sure why that is…some will make a turn around while sitting there some will not. But dont just expect us to know why you just showed up at our door. Dont be a dick when we ask you what we can do for you. Had a family walkin the other day…l 5 of them. When we asked what we could help them with they just stood ther, not one of them said a word! So we said…did someone pass away? … well apparently that was the winning question altho when they responded by pretty much jumping down our throats for asking well geeeezzzz…. then we were told…not asked…but told that .. the hospital called you!! In the brothers best asshole tone of voice… but they didnt call us and that is what the director told them. Told them the hosp didnt call and typically they dont call even tho theu like to tell families they will…so you see we have no idea that anyone has died let alone know or expect to know that you are this persons family. And if a hosp did call us we wouldnt do anuthing about it anyway until speaking with the family! We arent gonna get a call that someone died at such and such hosp and jump in the van and go get them! We cant! So…instead of being mad at us…who has no clue who you are ..be pissed at the person who said theu were gonna do something for you but didnt!
I have been just fed up with people lately…can you tell…!?! Just tired of putting up with bitching day in and day out. Or people not doung their jobs correctly because then it affects mine!