Life working in a funeral home…..really?


So, when deciding on what kind of funeral arrangements to have, I think most families think of everyone ‘else’, not themselves. I had a family recently that had a death in the family, a younger person, I believe she  was only 43. What the family said was ‘oh, we will need two days of visitation because there will be a lot of people who will be coming and then the third day we will have the funeral services, we will meet at the funeral home, then to the church then to the cemetery.”  I mean, of course if this is what the family wants then this is what the family will receive. But, it turns out not so many people showed up, well, at least not as many as they thought. They did not have a lot of money but scraped together enough for all of this. It bothered me because the mother of the deceased is not in good health herself and her other children were pushing for all this visitation time. She was just agreeing with them. They could have saved a lot of money by not doing so many hours at the funeral home, could have cut costs by not having the funeral service start at the funeral home and or just going straight the cemetery and having the chapel service. But, anyway, the first night of visitation was not busy but not slow either, there were quite a few people there who spent a lot of time outside! in the parking lot. being loud! now, we are on a main road, but we also have a residential area right next to us. So one would “think” or hope that people would respect the fact that people actually live next to the funeral home. Guess not. Also, when leaving that evening there were plenty of cups left all over the place, in the parking lot, thrown into the landscaping, everywhere, including beer bottles everywhere. What kind of respect for OUR property and the people who live near us is that? Do you litter you front yard with cups and beer bottles? I would hope not. Although I know there are some place like that around, I just find it to be disrespectful. We have trash cans. You walked back into the building before leaving for the night, why couldn’t you just bring in your cups when you walked in?

When we ask that you bring clothing in by a certain time, we aren’t just ‘making up’ a time, we actually need the clothing! We have to get the deceased dressed for visitation. It is not such an easy process to dress the deceased. It usually takes two people and a lift. So, I know that people may really not know that you can’t just “slip” the clothing on the deceased at the last-minute. It just doesn’t work that way. And when I call you because you were suppose to bring the clothing in the day before and it is the next day and viewing is to start that same day in a few hours, i really don’t appreciate a smart ass attitude.

I also don’t appreciate being argued with over certain things. When you want a burial, you will need a vault. I don’t care where you purchase that vault from, but you will need one. We sell them and of course we want you to buy it from us, why wouldn’t we? But, you can also purchase it through the cemetery if they sell them. I know I have complained about this before but it seems like almost everyone wants to argue over vaults with us anymore. It is required to have a vault. you can buy the least expensive one or you can buy one for $10,000, i don’t care. But you will need one!

Again on insurance. It takes time! Just because you filled out the claim form and I mailed it, does not mean that 5 days later I will hear anything! Sometimes it takes a few months! Sometimes I will hear back in a couple of weeks. Quit bugging me about it already! It has only been 5 days! We told you at the time that we would not know until we received a check in the mail or a phone call if something was wrong. So why are you coming in 5 days later to find out what is going on with it because we have not called you? Your not getting any of that money anyway. We are! It is paying for you funeral!

Also, please, if you want to “view” the deceased anytime prior to visitation time you MUST choose to have a family hour! WE ALWAYS ask at time of arrangement if you would like to have a family hour, just for family to view before ANYONE else is allowed to go in. ALWAYS! Even if you want to come in a day early for a few minutes, just a few immediate family members LET US KNOW when we ask! Do NOT call us a few days or the day before and ask “when does the family get to view the deceased, should we come in early? or can we come in on such and such a day?” NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!   I want to scream NO YOU CANNOT! we asked at the time of arrangements and you said NO!

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