working at a funeral home……yet more BS

why are people rude? mean? just plain assholes?

you know, i don’t know you from adam, but i’m certainly not going to treat you like shit. i am here to HELP! i did not ask you to come to me, you came to me! remember!?! i am doing my job. i am not being rude, because if i was rude to you or anyone else, well, i would get fired from my job. but what i want to know is why on earth are you being mean to me? i did nothing but let you in the building, ask you to have seat in the office AND ask if you would like something to drink, perhaps a nice warm cup of coffee? BUT, nooooooooooooooooo………… lets just start out being a jerk! while i sit across from you with a sympathetic smile on my face, but all the while thinking what a big fat fucking jerk off you are! then i have to deal with you over the next few days! lord help me! and why is it that you are upset that i have another family using our facilities on the same day as you wanted your visitation? do you think you should come first? you think you are special? more special than the family that have already made their arrangements? come on! and no, i cannot ask the family to move their times around to accomodate YOU! really? are you really that egotistical? oh, any yeah, your dad is a veteran and yes, he is entiled to a flag, but guess what, YOU DO need to bring me proof, no, I am NOT going to just take your word for it. I’d hand out flags all day long if it was up to me, but it isn’t and i explained to you that it wasn’t. i need a copy of your dad’s discharge papers, so i can make a copy and fill out a flag application and then turn it in to the post office so they will give me a flag. each flag they hand out is accounted for! so, really, it isn’t up to me! so until you bring me that discharge paper, screw you! i could have been nice and told you that we would display a flag for you, either folded in the cakset or draped over the casket, but no, i decided since you are such a wack job asshole that i wasn’t even going to give you that option. because for one, well, your an asshole and two, once i would have tried to explain to you that i could do that but you could not keep the flag you would have argued with me and then you probably would have left with the flag after your services anyway. oh well…….

when coming in to the funeral home to make arrangemetns, if you have a life insurance policy on the person who has passed, bring it with you. we will call the insurance company to make sure that the policy is in effect and to see if they will cover the costs of the funeral and if they accept assignments so the check is made out to the funeral home and you, the family, don’t have to worry about anything. of course if you prefer you can do this yourself, but you will be expected to pay us now, you can’t wait and pay us when you get the insurance money.  if you agree to do an assigment then you will not pay us anything. up to you! but bring that policy in or whatever info you have on it so we can call for you. if you bring me  a policy and i call on it and i am told that the policy is no good, then there is nothing i can do for you, so please don’t sit in front of me and say that you have been paying on it, you know it is good. sorry, nothing i can do and no i will not “try” to do an assigment after i have already been told that it is no good. also, many people have accidental death benefits, and if you or your loved ones dies and it is NOT accidental, then i can use that policy either! and usually, a drug overdose does not qualify as accidental! ahem….sooooo………


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