Haven’t had much time to post…..


So, again, it has been a while since I have posted. Things dont’ change much really. I am just amazed anymore, and I know I say it all the time, but people are just downright rude. I, for the life of me, just can’t imagine being rude or talk to someone I don’t know like they are a piece of trash. I recently had a family who applied for State aid. The only thing the funeral home does when it comes to State aid is print out a Statement of Good and Services, it is a breakdown of charges, the way the State wants it itemized. We print this paper out with the deceased name and date of death, the Director has to sign it and the family member who  is going to the DHS office has to sign it, they take that paper and a copy of the funeral contract to the DHS office. After we hand the family those things, we are done with it!!! The only thing that we need after that is either a verbal or faxed approval (or denial). We don’t deal directly with the DHS office or the social worker, if the social worker has a question they can contact the funeral home. We explain this to the family. We tell them before they leave, to please, if they can, do get the name of the social worker, “just incase” we need to contact them. We also tell them to let the social worker know that we will accept a verbal or faxed approval. SO, how many times do I get a family that calls me day after day after day, to find out if we have heard anything, and when I say “no, we have not”, they start getting pissy with me and ask my ‘why?”. How the hell do I know, they can take up to 10 days for an approval if they want……Then the family asks why aren’t we doing anything about it, and why are we taking so long, etc……WE DO NOT WORK FOR THE STATE, we are the funeral home!!!! I explain this time and time again. Then when I suggest that the family call the social worker, OH BOY! Oh NO, why should the family have to do anything extra, right? I mean give me a break. When i explain to them that we do not deal directly with them the only thing I do is print that statement for them, they just cannot accept it. I am so tired of dealing with this. Most of the funeral homes in my area WILL not and Do not accept payment from the State just because it is such a pain the ass anymore, and not such a pain in the ass working with the State, it is working with the family. We are probably one of the only funeral homes in my area that still work with the State. I can now see why the others have stopped. So, we get alot of families that we probably would normally not get.  And most of those families are PAIN IN THE ASSES! Also, if you are Baptist or a Jehova Witness, then it is probably best that you have your funeral “service” at your church. ALOT of people attend those services. Unless you are at a funeral home that has a really large chapel, then use your church. We get alot of Baptist families and I would say %98 of them do use their church, but once in a while they will want to use the funeral home and we really don’t have the room to accomodate everyone. We can probably seat about 75 people comfortably, but anything over that, people are going to be standing or sitting out in the hallway, etc…..THEN, of course we will start getting the complaints, not so much from the family, but for friends or relatives of the family. They make their comments on how awful it is that we are making people stand and that we need more room to accomodate everyone. OH! Okay, well hang on a sec and let me go build an addition realy quick, it will only take me a minute then you can have room to sit your fat ass down! I mean, come on, the family was well aware what the funeral home chapel looked like before they decided to have the service their, so SHUT UP! There are just too many people who attend and having at your church is easier on everyone. It just drives me nuts that people (not the family of the deceased) will come to me and make a comment or compaint about something that is none of their business. I have some families that do not want a sign in book. I don’t know why they don’t want it, it is not my job to question why they don’t want one. I will get people ALL day long coming in and saying “excuse me,but where is the sign in book, I would like to sign it and I did not see it in the room.” Then I have to tell them that there isn’t one, the family did not order one. They look at me like I just told them the world was ending. Then most of them proceed to say “what? why not?”. Then I have to tell them, I don’t know, they just didn’t order one. Then I will get “you mean you charge for them?” YES WE DO, why wouldn’ we? I know I have touched on the subject about bringing in food and having a luncheon aftward, but I will do it again. I recently had a family that said that they weren’t going to have any luncheon after the funeral services, they really did not have the money for it. So, the director who was doing the arrangement said to them, well you know you can bring some things here if you like, there is a lounge, you can bring in some cookies, or donuts, things like that, we have a pop machine, and if you like you could bring in some water, and we also supply all the coffee. So where in that sentence did the family hear that they could have their luncheon at the funeral home!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! They called me the next day to ask me how big the refrigerator we have is and do we have a “STOVE”!! Because they planned on bringing in the food for the luncheon. I told them we do not have a stove, we only have a microwave, and a small dorm room size fridge. I thought they were going to come thru the phone on me. They said that the director told them they could bring the food to the funeral home. I said sure, you can bring snack items, or sandwiches things like that and that they must have misunderstood the director. We actually don’t encourage alot of food at the funeral home. I mean come on people, really? You would really want to have your luncheon at a funeral home? Please………….get with it.

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